Hey there, fellow gamers! Today, we will take a trip down memory lane and talk about a classic that’s been a cornerstone of many childhoods – Mortal Kombat 1. Before we dive into the epic battles and spine-ripping fatalities, let’s get one thing straight: this game is more than just a button-mashing frenzy; it’s a universe of epic lies, hidden secrets, and chucklesome quirks. So, grab your popcorn and let’s unravel the hilarious truth about Mortal Kombat 1.
Mortal Kombat 1: The Game That Redefined ‘Fighting’
Remember the first time you picked up that controller? The anticipation was real! You were about to engage in some epic battles where the realm’s fate hung in the balance. Or so you thought. In reality, Mortal Kombat 1 is a fighting game that redefined the term ‘fighting’ to include flaming uppercuts and teleportation. The last time I checked, my karate classes didn’t cover that.
Mortal Kombat’s Incredibly Deep Storyline
Ah, the storyline of Mortal Kombat 1! It’s like Shakespearean drama meets Bruce Lee, right? Wrong! Picture this: two mystical realms, Earthrealm and Outworld, are in a fierce battle to the death. The only way to settle things? It was a martial arts tournament, of course. But what’s truly funny is the game’s commitment to its deep and intricate narrative, which boils down to “Beat everyone up, save the world.” Shakespeare would be proud.
Hilarious Character Selection
Now, let’s talk about the character selection screen. You have a whole roster of fighters with unique fighting styles and personalities. Well, that’s what they want you to think. Your choice often comes down to “Who looks the coolest?” or “Who has the craziest moves?” Forget strategy; we’re going full ‘eeny, meeny, miny, moe’ here.
A Button-Mashing Extravaganza
So, you’ve picked your fighter and are ready to kick some pixelated butt. Here’s the secret truth: button mashing is your best friend. Sure, you can learn combos and special moves, but when it comes to Mortal Kombat 1, smashing those buttons like you’re playing a piano concerto works just as well.
Fatality: Because Why Not?
Ah, the pièce de résistance of Mortal Kombat – the Fatality moves. These gruesome finishers take your opponent from “I’m fine” to “I’m in multiple pieces” in the blink of an eye. But here’s the kicker: executing a Fatality move is like teaching a cat to do the moonwalk. It’s hilarious how often you accidentally uppercut your opponent into oblivion while attempting these flashy moves.
The Mythical Block Button
Let’s talk about the block button. That one button is supposed to save you from your opponent’s deadly strikes. But in reality, it’s your panic button. You end up smashing it more than any other button, hoping it will magically make you invincible. Spoiler alert: it doesn’t, but it does make you look like you’re having a button-induced seizure.
Hidden Characters: Secrets or Rumors?
Mortal Kombat 1 is famous for its hidden characters. Finding these elusive fighters was the ultimate quest, whether it was Reptile or Scorpion’s cousin’s brother-in-law. Rumours and myths circulated about unlocking them, including “beat the game with your eyes closed” and “press every button with your nose.” Oh, the lengths we went to for these hidden gems!
The Enigmatic Ermac
Speaking of hidden characters, Ermac deserves a special mention. Ermac was said to be a secret character, and gamers spent countless hours trying to unlock him. It wasn’t until later that we realised Ermac wasn’t a hidden character – he was an error message! “Ermac” stands for “error macro,” it was just a glitch in the game. The gaming world collectively facepalmed at that one.
The ‘Toasty’ Surprise
Amid all the punches, kicks, and fatalities, you might have heard a voice shout, “Toasty!” Who is this Toasty fellow, and why is he so excited about our virtual brawls? Well, Toasty is none other than Dan Forden, the game’s sound designer, who decided to pop in and give us a good chuckle now and then. Thanks for the laughs, Dan!
Flawless Victory – Not So Flawless
Ah, the sweet sound of “Flawless Victory.” It’s the ultimate bragging right, indicating you didn’t get hit once during a round. But let’s be honest, a feeling of guilt often follows it because you exploited some cheap move to achieve it. Flawless Victory? More like Flawless Exploitation.
The Immortal Shang Tsung
Shang Tsung, the game’s main antagonist, is known for his ability to morph into other characters and steal their moves. But here’s the hilarious twist: Shang Tsung never quite mastered the art of morphing into his opponents’ actual size. So, when he morphs into someone like Goro, he becomes a mini-Goro that’s about as intimidating as a chihuahua.
The Art of ‘Button Slamming’
We’ve all been locked in an intense battle, hearts pounding, fingers flying across the controller. What are we doing? Button slamming, that’s what. It’s a highly technical and strategic manoeuvre where you slam your fingers on the controller like you’re trying to play the drums. It rarely works, but it’s great stress relief!
The Ultimate Revenge: Friendship Moves
In a world full of spine-ripping fatalities, there’s an unexpected twist – Friendship moves. These are moves where you show your opponent a little kindness instead of finishing them off. You might offer them a flower, a teddy bear, or a snack. It’s like saying, “Hey, I just beat you senseless, but here’s a lollipop to improve it.”
The Towering Goro
Now, let’s talk about Goro, the four-armed behemoth. He’s a fearsome opponent, no doubt. But have you ever noticed how he towers over everyone else? It’s like he’s auditioning for the NBA while everyone else is stuck in a martial arts tournament. He may need a step ladder to reach his opponents.
The Mysterious Kano
With his eye laser and cybernetic heart, Kano is one mysterious character. But here’s the thing – his moves were so overpowered that you could practically close your eyes and spam his abilities to victory. It’s like the game developers were saying, “We’ll give you a robot eye and a laser, but don’t forget to bring your cheese!”
The ‘To Be Continued’ Hoax
After defeating Shang Tsung, you might have seen the compelling message “To Be Continued” flash on the screen. Your heart raced as you imagined the epic battles in Mortal Kombat 2. But here’s the kicker: it was a total hoax! Mortal Kombat 2 didn’t continue from the first game’s storyline. It was like ordering a pizza and getting a salad instead.
The Unforgettable Music
Let’s take a moment to appreciate the music in Mortal Kombat 1. Those iconic tunes that played during fights are etched into our gaming souls. Humming along to that unforgettable theme music is like a secret handshake among gamers. You can’t help but feel like a champion, even if you’re getting your butt kicked.
Abilities: Because Babies Solve Everything
If Friendship moves weren’t enough, there’s an even more bizarre finisher in Mortal Kombat 1 – Babalities. Yes, you heard it right. Instead of defeating your opponent, you can turn them into a baby. Nothing says “I win”, like transforming your enemy into a diaper-wearing, cooing infant.
The Frustration of ‘Get Over Here!’
With his famous catchphrase “Get over here!” and spear-throwing move, Scorpion is a source of endless frustration. You’ll hear that phrase in your nightmares as you desperately try to dodge his spear. It’s like Scorpion is your annoying friend who can’t stop nagging you to join his martial arts class.
The Legendary Reptile
Reptile, the elusive green ninja, was one of the most sought-after characters in the game. Players scoured the arcade cabinets for hidden clues on how to unlock him. The legend grew, and soon, people were convinced that if you could defeat your opponent with only low kicks on The Pit stage while it was snowing on a Tuesday, Reptile would magically appear. Ah, the power of gaming myths!
A Sense of Accomplishment
Mortal Kombat 1 was more than just a game; it was an experience. Despite its quirks, hilarious glitches, and questionable character balance, it gave us a sense of accomplishment. We battled through the humour and the chaos to emerge victorious, and in the process, we created lasting memories.
So, the next time you pick up Mortal Kombat 1, remember it’s not just about the fighting. It’s about the laughs, the surprises, and the friends you made while spamming Kano’s eye laser. And always remember that in the world of Mortal Kombat, the real winner is the one who can laugh in the face of a Flawless Victory.
Now go out there, pick your fighter, and let the hilarity ensue! It’s time to embrace the chaos of Mortal Kombat 1 and revel in the fact that you can defeat your opponent with a Babality. Who knew babies were the ultimate warriors?
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Leon Magana